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PostPosted: Thu Aug 30, 2018 6:33 pm 
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Was sending a link for Kester 63/37 rosin-core solder to a forum poster and came across this absolutely CLASSIC customer review:

Plumbum.... A "other Metal" by any other name would smell just as sweet.
By Spukhafte on June 10, 2014
Verified Purchase

Have you ever wanted to solder micro PCB transistors and resistors like a demi god/ robot? Then this solder is for you.

Do you want a lead solder with a competent flux that will bond your connections like a champ, and give off fumes with the sweet taste of Bismuth salts and antimony that pairs nicely with a glass of Montepulciano or a Sanghiovese?
Then this flux core is for you.

Do you want to live as long as possible and keep your sperm count up? Then maybe you'd prefer a RoHS solder, and after throwing it across the room you'll realize: laboratories and electronics are not for you.

We all die sometime, we're surrounded by death. No need for the constant reminder from our electronic devices that die before their time, due to inferior RoHS compliant solders.

Women like mysterious dangerous men, and what could be more dangerous than a man who breathes fire and lead fumes? Nothing. Take it from me: a scientist; put a roll of this bad boy in your laboratory and watch the panties drop. Now I know what you're thinking: "we have a disparity in the sciences, with too few women taking degrees in the hard sciences thanks to years of uninformed dogmatic gender role ascribing women to careers other than the hard sciences. Now we're paying the price. Do you realize how hard it is to get a lady in your laboratory?"

Well, true. And no. I don't.
because I use spools of lead solder.

Fact: women are drawn to the sweet smell of Bismuth salts and the pheromones excreted by a man with acute lead toxicity coursing through his veins are unmistakably unique.

It intoxicates their senses, they're drawn on a genetic level to procreate with you *immediately* because, with lead, there might not be much more time.

Pretty sure Darwin mentions the mechanics of this exact biological drive in his work "The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals" but I wouldn't know. I'm a real scientist, not a biologist so I've not the time to read such quackery.

What I do know about women I've learned from observation and Captain Kirk.

From observation I can assure you, heat up some of this solder, sit back and watch the women come in droves. Your lab will make Hugh's house look an all boy's academy. Hang another roll from your review mirror. Trust me. This solder will save us from the gender disparity in the sciences. It will save future generations. But, don't wait, copulate. After all, it is lead bearing solder, so there's not much time.

I will continue to buy this solder.

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PostPosted: Fri Aug 31, 2018 5:26 am 
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Oh my. :lol: :lol:
Some people are generous with their time.


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PostPosted: Fri Aug 31, 2018 6:15 am 
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:lol: I'd like to invite this guy to my next party.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2018 10:32 am 
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duhvoodooman wrote:
Pretty sure Darwin mentions the mechanics of this exact biological drive in his work "The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals" but I wouldn't know. I'm a real scientist, not a biologist so I've not the time to read such quackery.

As a scientist, and subsequent to a deduction of points for poor grammar, I can quantitatively state that this is the funniest sentence in the review.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2018 11:34 am 
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Just an aside for those of you (most, I would think) who may not have any substantive chemical background and/or forgot most of what you were taught in HS chemistry:

The first word of this guy's review is "plumbum", which is the Latin word for the metallic element lead, as well as the reason that its symbol in the periodic table is "Pb." So just file that away in your mental repository of mostly useless knowledge!

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2018 11:56 am 
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Morgan wrote:
duhvoodooman wrote:
Pretty sure Darwin mentions the mechanics of this exact biological drive in his work "The Expression of the Emotions in Man and Animals" but I wouldn't know. I'm a real scientist, not a biologist so I've not the time to read such quackery.

As a scientist, and subsequent to a deduction of points for poor grammar, I can quantitatively state that this is the funniest sentence in the review.


I have a Zoology degree. A long time ago a friend who taught Chemistry told me "When you "bee-ologists" can run an experiment twice and get the same answer, then you can call it a science." Harumph.

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PostPosted: Mon Sep 10, 2018 1:14 pm 
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:lol: I kid my biologist brethren. We all love the bugs & bunnies!

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2018 4:33 am 
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Not sure how I missed this thread earlier. Very funny stuff, especially since that lead-free solder really is the worst. :)

Cheeky Amazon reviews are a favorite genre of mine. There’s a review of a jumbo pack of tissues by a mom of three teenage boys. I don’t have time to look up a link, which is probably just as well… but I’m sure you could find it.

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PostPosted: Fri Sep 14, 2018 5:26 am 
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Funny online reviews are a thing? Will wonders never cease.


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